You want me to do what?!

Never did I think that when I decided to join the National Bone Marrow Registry back in 2010, that I would ever be called as a potential match.  Well, I was wrong.  I was first notified in April of 2012 that I was narrowed as a potential along with many others.  I was asked if I was still interested in donating and that was the end of it I thought.  Honestly, it slipped my mind.  Then at the end of June 2012, when I was preparing for a move to North Carolina, I was contacted for confirmatory testing.  I had appeared as a close match and needed to undergo confirmatory testing to assure that I was indeed a perfect match for a female suffering from leukemia.  After I completed the million question health questionnaire (it felt like), I really still didn’t think that much about it.  Talked it over with my family and friends and decided I would still continue through.  Then the next day at work it hit me.  Standing over a beautiful baby girl, trying desperately to console her to sleep, it hit me.  I’ve so felt the Lord’s presence lately.  It’s gotten me at the weirdest but most perfect times.  I couldn’t help but stand over the baby and think about the amazing opportunity in front of me.  I looked out the window at the helipad for our hospital, I looked beyond in the distance at another major medical facility down the road, and literally felt like my breath had been taken away.  I realized just how close I was to the opportunity to donate bone marrow and despite the mixed signals I was getting from friends, I knew I had to continue as far as I could go. 

I am no longer living for myself.  I have someone that is counting on me.  Someone who doesn’t even know me is hoping with all her heart that I will be her perfect match.  That I will be her second chance at life, or at least a few more years to spend with her family and friends.  For me to live is Christ, and to die is gain.  That is my cry and it’s time that I start living boldly like that is true in my life, no matter what the cost or sacrifice.

I have to imagine that’s what it feels like to be a mom.  I’m not a mom but I believe that one day I will be and I have to think that when you’re a mom you would give any and everything for your child and you wouldn’t think twice about it.  I also think that this girl could be a member of my family.  If that were true, absolutely I would donate and I wouldn’t think anything about it.  So, why not continue in this process?  Why would I not donate?  If I am a match, and her only match, why would I not go ahead and donate if there is at least a chance or glimmer of hope that it would help her?  I would be crazy not to and I think I would regret it later.  When I stop to think about it, just like I did with that beautiful baby I mentioned above, I realize this just may be an answer to my prayer.  I want to be a part of somebody else’s story.  Lord, use me to impact someone else’s life; to impact their destiny; to lead them to You.

I heard a song today that talked about God’s ways of answering our prayers.  It may not always be an answer that we think we should get, but it is God’s answer.  Therefore, we must make the best of that answer.  There have definitely been times in my life where I haven’t been a fan of the answer but I am learning slowly that it’s about our perspective.  The song was “Gratitude” by Nicole Nordeman.  Here are just a few lyrics of the positive song:

Or maybe not, not today
Peace might be another world away
And if that's the case . . .

We'll give thanks to You
With gratitude
For lessons learned in how to trust in You
That we are blessed beyond what we could ever dream
In abundance or in need
And if You never grant us peace

But Jesus, would You please . .

Click here to hear the full song!

Jesus, would you please work in me and use me to impact someone else’s life for Your good.  I may have no clue what in the world I am doing, but I will trust You. Every step of the way. I may not be the perfect match for the above patient but at least I know that I have done as much as I can to help.  Until then and each day, my prayer is that I will accept every challenge and every opportunity with an open heart, eagerly anticipating “good”.  I choose to see a good day, starting now and forever. 

Pop’s generous spirit is living on.  He wouldn’t want me to be sad.  He never had a bad day and always had a positive perspective.  Why shouldn’t I?  <3